


The Poncy Pirate Has A Birthday

by salixbabylon



Category: Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies)
Genre: Birthday Spanking, Bondage, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-05-04
Updated: 2004-05-04
Packaged: 2019-05-19 05:36:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14867636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/salixbabylon/pseuds/salixbabylon
Summary: Will has a birthday.  Spankings ensue.





	The Poncy Pirate Has A Birthday

**Author's Note:**

> Completely idiotic crack fic that I typed up for Losti on Y!M but she was at work, so I couldn't write the smut for her, so now I have and here it is. Yes, it's bad. It's intentional. Not betaed, not anything. Total crap.
> 
> For [**lostiawen**](http://lostiawen.livejournal.com/), whose birthday is today and who wanted to play with Jack and Will. I hope you enjoy your cider and peaches, dearie. *smooch*

One balmy day Jack and Will were walking down the street.

"That's a very pretty sword in that window!" Will exclaimed jubilantly.

"Shall I steal it for you?" Jack gallantly offered, a disconcerting twinkle in his eyes.

"Now, Jack, that would be morally wrong," Will said, with a chastising tone.

"Pirate," Jack pointed out, as usual. He never could resist a cliche.

"Yes, I know, 'take what you can,' blah blah blah," Will said, rolling his eyes. "I'm going into that tavern," Will pointed, "and you're going to -buy- that sword, with the contents of that heavy purse hanging on your belt."

Jack sighed in resignation. "Fine, luv. I'll meet you there," he added with a swish, watching Will walk away. Such a nice view the boy offered, from the back. Or front. Either one, really, especially below the waist, Jack thought.

But to buy a sword... There had better be a reward to make such reprehensible behavior worth the few gold coins he'd allow himself to be bargained out of. If indeed he deigned to buy the sword at all. Maybe he would come up with another gift.

***

Back in the tavern, Will nursed a weak pint of ale, wishing forlornly for apple cider. It seemed apples were more difficult to get here than in Port Royale. Alas.

Eventually, Jack joined him, without the sword. Will pouted, his feeble mustache trembling pitifully. "Where's my sword, Jack? It's my birthday and you owe me a present," he whined.

"The sword was pretty but not at all well made. Not at all up to your standards," Jack answered, downing an amazing amount of rum. "B'sides, birthdays aren't just about presents, you know," he added with a leer.

Will pouted more. The whelp could pout with more vigor than anyone Jack had ever met. Made him look a bit of an effete, truth be told, Jack thought. Not in a bad way, though.

"You still have the traditional birthday spankings comin' to you," Jack finally finished, after draining the rest of the bottle.

Will squirmed with excitement. A spanking! A spanking! Jack's spankings were very special and Will was practically beside himself with glee. He casually pulled his hat into his lap to hide any incriminating bulges.

Jack leered again, showing gold teeth. "Nice to see your arse isn't quite as tight as your morals."

Will scowled.

***

Finally, the rest of the crew with names (Gibbs, Anamaria, Cotton) joined Will and Jack for dinner. At the end, a saucy wench with stunning cleavage came out from the back with a large mug of cider for Will (courtesy of the _Pearl_ 's stores) and everyone sang the 16th century's version of "happy birthday," making Will blush and squirm.

Jack grinned, knowing how the boy hated to be the center of attention, despite his preference for big hats with feathers that just screamed "nancying poncy pervy pirate."

"Can we leave now?" Will asked, cheeks charmingly flushed, after the singing faded off into the usual bawdy songs about wenches and carrots.

"Aren't you forgettin' about your spankin?" Jack asked. "All these folks will be wanting to know how old you truly are. There's bets everywhere from 18 to 25."

"Not here!" Will exclaimed, grabbing his bottom protectively.

"Why not, luv?" Jack grinned. "Everyone on board knows what we get up to when you've been naughty. The walls aren't as thick as you might be hopin' they were, if you catch my meanin'."

"They -know-?" Will gasped, shocked beyond anything. The perversity of the young blacksmith-turned-pirate was common gossip among the rest of the scurvy sea monkeys aboard the _Pearl_?

"We know," Anamaria said, handily butting in and tying Will's arms behind his back with a sash. Luckily the boy was flexible enough to hold his elbows and his unprotected derriere clenched in anticipation.

"Thankee, wench," Jack said to Anamaria for her timely intervention. "Now we can get started."

Jack and Gibbs pulled Will up to stand next to the table as the crowd gathered 'round. Jack quickly stripped off Will's breeches and left them to tangle his feet, where he stood. Ah, the lad's legs looked so pretty in just his stockings. And so well behaved, after the initial struggle with Anamaria. No one was buying his reticence anyway.

"Count," Jack commanded in his "Captain Jack Sparrow, notoriously deadly pirate" voice, as his hand landed on Will's white arse with a loud smack.

By five blows, Will's shirt was soaked with sweat. By ten, his peachy cheeks glowed red. Jack took a brief break to walk around front and confirm that Will's shirt wasn't hiding his erection pink and glistening, jutting forward eagerly. This was one of it's favorite games.

By fifteen, the whelp was moaning, and by nineteen, panting audibly. Jack kept going, waiting for Will to indicate that the proper number of spankings had been bestowed.

After twenty he took another break, massaging his hot and tingling hand, to walk around and check out Will from the front again. Anamaria and Gibbs were each holding Will up by a shoulder, looking bored/disgusted and vaguely embarrassed/aroused, respectively. The boy was trembling and Jack could tell he was close to begging for a good reaming. With every blow, Will's cock jerked and his body trembled. Moisture leaked from the end, dripping to the floor with each movement.

At twenty-three smacks, Jack's hand was beginning to throb and he was stunned that Will could possibly be that old. The lad was barely able to gasp out the numbers anymore, and Jack was frankly amazed that Will could still count.

"Twenty-four! Oh, yes! Twenty-five!" Will groaned, writhing shamelessly in his captors' hands.

"Twenty-six, oh, Jack, please," he cried as the next blow fell.

"Ahh! Jack!" he screamed as the next blow landed, ribbons of pearlescent fluid spurting eagerly from his cock as he jerked and twisted, his body collapsing with his release. "Twenty-seven," he moaned, falling backward into Jack's waiting arms. "Please, stop."

Jack gathered him close and finally breached that succulent little mouth, mumbling, "An' a kiss to make it all better," as his tongue plundered the former blacksmith's warmth. Ignoring the applause of the crowd, Jack heaved a boneless Will over one shoulder and carried him, bare and reddened arse-up, out of the tavern to the Pearl.

***

Later that night, back in the Captain's cabin aboard the _Pearl_ , the two pirates lay in bed, satiated.

"Jack," Will sighed, an expression of such bliss covering his face that it seeped into his words, "That was the best birthday ever."

"Aye," Jack concurred. "You got yourself a pretty sword eventually, after a sort. And the fine people got a lively show. Anamaria was so impressed that you, er, reached your glory, as it were, in front of all those people, on the very last smack... And I had no idea you were 27," Jack continued after a moment.

Will grinned lazily as he snuggled into Jack's embrace. "I'm not. I'm 19," he admitted, yawning.

Jack lay there in shocked silence for a moment before WIll's sleepy giggle startled him.

"Pirate," Will whispered smugly.

"My pirate," Jack said, pulling the boy closer, as the waves and the _Pearl_ rocked them both to sleep.


End file.
